My So-Called Life

Just start writing.

My So-Called Life (1994)

I can't tell you how many drafts I have from the last few months. The issue is that I haven't known where to start when it comes to the last year and a half of my life. It has been insane.

I've been back in Florida since November 2024. I've spent the last few months cleaning out my storage unit and getting rid/selling stuff that didn't fit my life any longer. If there's one thing I know- it's that I want to remain mobile and travel. Every effort over the last year for me has been geared towards this desire.

I want to write, travel, make videos, and experience life in its fullest expression.

I plan to remain in Florida a bit longer. I have a few more things to do here.

I needed to get organized and clean out my life a bit. While I was traveling abroad, I would periodically come back to Florida and switch things out in storage, and I have been paying way too much to store furniture that I haven't had a use for in a long time. I've decided what suits me best at the moment is living out of a smaller storage unit and my vehicle. I'm not planning to stay in Florida long-term, and most likely, I'll end up moving out of the country. I've just found a lot of other places that I feel more aligned with than the United States.

I bought a vehicle while I'm back in the U.S. but ideally, I wouldn't need to own one. It's quite challenging living in the United States and not owning a vehicle. It's hard to comprehend why we never developed public transit systems here.

I have fully immersed myself into trying to realize a dream I've had for a while. I only wish I would've had the guts to do it sooner. It's going to take quite a bit of sacrifice in the meantime. I have no problem with sacrifice, and I actually really enjoy the challenge. Every day, I have the opportunity to show up with more ingenuity and creativity.

Every day is an entirely new set of challenges and solutions, and for now, I am finding a lot of joy in this existence.

It's been a long, hard road out of storage

It's only been in the last few days that I feel caught up with storage and like I've accomplished a goal. I've transformed the new unit into a writing/painting studio while also being able to hold onto some of the possessions closest to my heart. As a bonus, the storage facility is also a fantastic place for skating and meditation. For the most part, it is incredibly quiet and peaceful here. Is this a kosher use of a storage unit? I don't know. I don't know if anyone uses a storage unit as an alternative space, but maybe they should.

I've been planning on doing this for nearly a year now- not all of it, really. I was planning to do car life, but using storage as a creative space evolved as I was getting organized. It seemed like an obvious solution for the time being. As for my vehicle, I spent months researching and planning. I invested in all the things I needed to live this way. I have a refrigerator in my car; it's been really convenient, and I enjoy the gentle hum at night while falling asleep. As for comfort, it's been better than I imagined. I have a memory foam twin-size pad in the back, a cozy zero-degree sleeping bag for the colder nights, and a light blanket for the rest of the time. I have batteries that power anything that needs power, including the refrigerator, at all times. I have to recharge my large Jackery approximately every 4-5 days. It only takes an hour to recharge from zero, and I do that while I'm working in storage. Fortunately, I have access to power here, but I plan to invest in solar eventually, so I have a more sustainable solution for when I'm on the road. All my batteries are solar compatible.

The current setup

Aside from constant creative problem-solving, my favorite part of living out of my car is how much closer I feel to life. I feel immersed in life at all times, and it's been very rewarding. I am closer to nature and certainly at mercy to the weather. Every day feels like an adventure—good or bad. Every day is a new story; this lifestyle isn't routine.

I already mentioned that this lifestyle is allowing me more focus on my dreams, but there are a few other reasons I've made this decision. Another reason is to get out of my comfort zone and become more integrated with community no matter where I am. Socially, I can be pretty shy and introverted. I tend to self-isolate. I don't feel that isolating myself is productive, and it's not who I want to be. Barbara Sher talks about isolation is the dream killer in a TED talk, and I tend to agree with her. Nothing good has ever come into my life through isolation; I find it very limiting, and I am on a path of expansion. I am not here to be 'comfortable.' I can say that spending a lot of time alone has given me a great deal of peace and plenty of room to get to know myself. Moving forward, I'd like my life to be more about action than introspection. Don't get me wrong, I am all about introspection, but I tend to get lost in my inner world and forget to come back out. I need to balance my rich inner world more with the outer world. It's been just as productive as I imagined it would be so far. I find myself out in the community more than I've ever been. Even when working on my computer, I often go to communal spaces and am constantly discovering things I previously didn't know existed. I have many more joyful interactions with others daily, which brings more value to my day. Since I've got my storage space sorted, I'm hoping to start volunteering with local organizations- something I haven't been able to do in a very long time.

My grandmother battled with agoraphobia. Watching her go through that while I was growing up was rough. It's always strange to see the personal battles people face up close because publicly, she was magical. She was the life of the party and our family. While I've never struggled with agoraphobia on the level she did, I do feel like I can understand to some degree how difficult it must've been. My own struggle with and propensity for isolation has been challenging enough. I've always had to push the envelope of my own discomfort to ensure I don't fall victim to shutting myself away. It feels much easier when I am alone, but I don't think that's the way forward, especially with how things are going collectively. We all need each other and our communities now more than ever. I only expect that need to increase over the next few years.

My goal is to start writing again on a consistent basis. The last year and a half has been the most challenging time of my life, so far, and I really didn't even know how to get started back. Today, instead of taking a deep dive into the heaviness, I wanted to talk about the present. I wanted an easier place to start. My intention is to write daily, but I don't want to put too much pressure on myself. So, we'll see how it goes.

Currently reading: The Great Mental Models by Rhiannon Beaubien and Shane Parrish

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